Empire of the Odd

WASHINGTON – The White House drops a bombshell.  President Obama is Xenu, the dictator of the Galactic Confederacy.

Amid the growing controversy about the mosque being built at Ground Zero and in light of the 24% of Americans that believe President Obama is a Muslim, the White House decided to finally reveal the truth about the President’s true spiritual identity.

“He is Xenu,” White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs told reporters at this morning’s briefing. “He is an alien dictator who brought billions of his people to Earth in a spacecraft 75 million years ago.  He stacked them around volcanoes and killed them using hydrogen bombs. That’s the story of human life on earth.”

A stunned White House Press Corps fired questions at Gibbs, but he dismissed them all with this statement, “I’m sorry, I can’t answer your questions anymore, because you are not clear. When you all get clear, then I can talk to you, until then… forget it.  You are all psychology damaged. Read Dianetics. That’ll get you started.”

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LAS VEGAS, Aug. 17 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ — Maitreya Rael, founder and leader of the International Raelian Movement, announced in a statement released today that a UFO that appeared over the Hangzhou airport, forcing authorities to close that facility, is “just the beginning of a huge wave of UFO apparitions that will appear starting now all over China.”

“These UFO s are the vessels used by the Elohim, our creators from space who were described in all ancient Chinese traditions, and who a long time ago had children with the Chinese,” Rael said. “That’s why the Chinese call themselves ‘children from the sky.'”

He added that the Elohim wish to have an embassy built to officially welcome them back to Earth, and they would like it to be build in China.

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• So, when you her the phrase #stupidscientology everybody scream! #
• "Somebody some day will say 'this is illegal.' By then be sure the orgs say what is legal or not." – L. Ron Hubbard, #stupidscientology #
• Saying Scientology is stupid is a gross redundancy. #stupidscientology #
• #stupidscientology "We're playing for blood, the stake is EARTH." – L. Ron Hubbard. #

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An old video from The Onion revealing a hyperbolic martial law bill was recently rediscovered by conservatives, and began to pop up on right-wing Facebook walls.Congratulations tea-baggers, you fell for a 3-year-old joke.

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Telegraph View: The law has established a climate within which pettiness flourishes to the detriment of any common sense.

A councillor faces suspension for dismissing Scientology as “stupid”; another is convicted of racial harassment for calling a colleague a coconut; a householder is made to feel like a racist for objecting to a gipsy site near his home. Every day, it seems, brings another tale of how comments that a few years ago would have been regarded as nothing worse than rudeness – or simply a difference of opinion – have either been criminalised or considered a justification for disciplinary action.

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#stupidscientology “We’re playing for blood, the stake is EARTH.” – L. Ron Hubbard.

Saying Scientology is stupid is a gross redundancy. #stupidscientology

“Somebody some day will say ‘this is illegal.’ By then be sure the orgs say what is legal or not.” – L. Ron Hubbard, #stupidscientology

So, when you her the phrase #stupidscientology everybody scream!

“An unidentified flying object (UFO) disrupted air traffic over Zhejiang’s provincial capital Hangzhou late on Wednesday [July 7], the municipal government said on Thursday. Xiaoshan Airport was closed after the UFO was detected at around 9 pm, and some flights were rerouted …

A source with knowledge of the matter, however, told China Daily on Thursday that authorities had learned what the UFO was after an investigation. But it was not the proper time to publicly disclose the information because there was a military connection, he said, adding that an official explanation is expected to be given on Friday.” [source: People’s Daily, July 9, 2010]

And yet, no official explanation has come after more than a week. Though the Internet is still buzzing with speculation about why the Chinese government wouldn’t clarify the case, perhaps the most immediate question should be why should we trust that anonymous source. Did the source really had “knowledge of the matter”? Or was it simply an unreliable source, which may not even exist?

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