Ask an Amateur Scientist: Washington UFO Flap

I. The Setup

Our nations capital has always been a hotspot for odd sightings. Residents have been known to bear witness to roving bands of congressionally hired prostitutes. Paper currency literally seeps from the pores in lobbyists skin. Joggers along the Potomac have snapped blurry photos of a mysterious creature known only as Ted Kennedy. And if you walk down any Washington, D.C. street, you’re likely to see something you won’t see anywhere else: American citizens with absolutely no federal representation.

It’s a weird place for sure. Compared to its normal supply of signs and wonders, something like the 1952 UFO flap seems downright pedestrian. After all, what are a few unexplained radar blips and contradictory eyewitness reports when stacked up against the kind of genetic anomalies that result in Rep. Henry Waxman’s face?

But if you were to read one of the ubiquitous UFO books clogging Barnes & Noble’s “New Age” section, you’d think the so-called “Washington incident” was actually interesting. You’d also probably find a few Penthouse Forum-esque accounts of steamy woman-on-lizard-alien action, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. (Unless you want to stop reading this now and go check out the emerging literary field of crypto-erotica. And believe me, you do.)

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